The Ultimate Deep Pan Pizza

So after my decision to impart even more of my knowledge of the world on this site, rather than just my boring photos and must, I am going to start with this epic feast. I am not sure why, when my oven is fucked and I can’t make it, but hey. I am a some kind of a masochist at times.

This bears about as much relation to a ‘true’ Italian Pizza, as a Chicken Tikka Masala does to real Indian food. But who cares when it’s as yummy as this.

You need a big roasting tin for this – none of your fandangled pizza trays, stone base things, or baking sheets. The kind of thing you put a turkey in is needed… You’ll see why.

Ingredients:

For the Base:

750g Strong White Bread Flour

1 Pint Hand Hot water

Bread Yeast (follow the instructions!)

1tsp Sugar

2tsp Salt

50ml Olive Oil

For the Toppings:

2 Tins Chopped Tomatoes

1 Small Tin/Half a Tube Tomato Purée

3 Medium Onions

Half a Head of Garlic

Chili Paste/Crushed Chillies to taste.

50ml Olive Oil

Handful Fresh Oregano

200g Good Cheddar Cheese

For the Garnish:

Whatever you fancy – Anchovies, Salami and Olives is a good one for a total salt kick. Them Veggie Types could have slices of Grilled Aubergine and Roundels of Peppers… Just don’t spoil it by trying to be healthy now, will you…

Method:

1 ) Make the dough. The easiest way of doing this is follow the instructions with the yeast. These differ: The best I have found is Allinsons which comes in a tin, not silly little sachets. Use a heaped desert-spoon of this and dissolve this in the water, along with the sugar. Leave in a warm place until it goes frothy.

2 ) Mix the salt with the flour – this is important, it improves the dough. Then mix in the olive oil. When the yeast has frothed up, whisk it, and mix it slowly with the flour. Slowly means don’t chuck it all in at once, but make a well in the middle of the flour and add the water at a steady pace, bringing the flour in from the sides.  Sensible people do this in a big bowl. Show-offs do it directly on the surface.

3 ) When the dough forms a ball that is not too sticky (you may have to add a bit more flour or water depending on how it’s feeling) take it out of the bowl and knead it for 10 minutes. Jaime Oliver says kneading dough should be like caressing breasts. Personally I prefer to be a bit rougher – the kneading that it. Basically you are stretching the dough out and bunching it together again. Time the 10 minutes. If you don’t have a timer (or a convenient piece of Prog-Rock to listen to) do it for what you think is 10 minutes and then do it for the same again. Trust me, it seems a very long time to knead dough, that’s because it is.

4 ) Grease the inside of the roasting tin, and lay the dough inside, spreading it out so it is flat on the base, and rides right up the sides. When I said Deep Pan, I did mean deep. Leave this is a warm place for half an hour or so, to rise. Don’t put it in a bag like raising bread dough by the way, a bit of a crust will help hold the uber-topping.

5 ) While this is rising make the sauce. Chop the onions and garlic semi-roughly – by that I mean remember they are going in sauce, so no half hemisphere chunks, but none of this superfine haute cuisine slicing. Fry these gently in the olive oil until they just begin to soften.

6 ) Add the chilli, oregano and tomato purée, and stir until the onions are coated and the tomato puree is beginning to darken slightly – this makes it sweet. Add the tinned tomatoes, and then simmer until the mixture is thickening to about the consistency of ketchup.

7 ) When the base has risen (aim for the middle to be about 2/3rds of the height of the tin, and the walls to be poking over the edges), spread the sauce GENTLY over the base. See that big bold capitalised word? Take heed of it. If you don’t your base will flop and you will get a stodgy mess. In that case, give up and buy a Domino’s, yes, it will be that spoilt that even a Domino’s will be better. Grate the cheese over the top, and decorate your pizza with whatever toppings you like. Just bear in mind the gentleness, and also work quite fast. Also, if like me you need to rise dough in a warm oven, whack this up to 9 at this point.

8 ) Bake in an oven at about gas 7 (either preheated, or turned down if you used my raising method). This is the bit I am never so good at with my recipes (even worse than measurements) but about half an hour should be OK. The crust should sound hollow when tapped, and the cheese should be done. If you are not sure you can poke something in through the middle, and see if there is wet dough on it.

You will want to eat this right away, but remember the inside will be about as hot as the interior of a supernova, so wait a bit. Also this is compounded by the fact that until it’s cooled some, don’t even bother trying to lift it out on to a cooling rack.

Mmmmmm!